Book Introduction: “The Narco-Festo”

Nicholas K. is a long-time DeepDotWeb reader. The Narco-Festo is his first book and he wants to share chapter eight—entitled “Bath Salts? RCs?”—free for DDW readers. The book is priced at a reasonable $2.99. The Amazon Kindle Store link below will offer a free sample from chapter one as well. A brief back story, in his own words:

Hello. My name is Nicholas K. and I reside in Washington, DC. I’ve been living life in DC seven years now, but I hail from California for the first 25 years of it. I hold a B.A. in journalism from San Diego State University, and a master’s in foreign affairs from University of San Diego. I work full-time as a professional drug addict, plus I moonlight as an author/journalist (this is my first book). I wrote this book on a topic I know intimately: Narcotics. They are fun and thus why I wrote a book that treats it as such.

This book is 96 pages; I aim to dent your perspective on narcotics utilizing that space. It may seem as if things are bleak as ever for a topic matter as derided and shamed as the drug trade. The narco-economy breeds every ill that alcohol prohibition suffered. So, let’s just repeat the whole thing again, just for a lot longer this time!

“But—Nicholas—um, that’s like totes different,” squeaks a respondent. “Alcohol prohibition was a complete failure. And we’ve learned that now; we repealed that with the Twenty-first Amendment in 1933. We can see how different drugs are from alcohol.”

This occurs while persona oblivious(a) sips on their second mimosa. I don’t hate alcohol, nor do I hate the alcohol industry. Far from it. But, jeez, they should take some credit for obliviousness like this. No—seriously, this exact type of obliviousness. A lot of advertising dollars are expended to keep you thinking this drug (alcohol) is not a drug … yet at the same time, said alcohol is the drugs industry—and all to itself! Serious chip-on-shoulder goings-on be going on at the local watering hole.

I won’t talk [much] more about alcohol in this book. Promise. There’s only one chapter devoted to it and it is pretty funny. But this is a quick, energetic read. It will be very funny because I am funny. I do (and will probably do again) narcotics because they are fun. The histrionics and megalomania are just not my domain. No, I do not need drama like that to sell tabloid sleaze like this. The truth enough is fun..

So, please for a day put the “former drug user” on hold. Put the hiding—into hiding. You are safe, with me playing the foil from inside the trenches. Here at The Narco-Festo you are assumed to be you. An American. An American with balls. And—now—a vagina too if a Kardashian.

So this book aims to lionize Scott Disick. Done.

The link for The Narco-Festo on Amazon.com.

The Narco-Festo Chapter Eight Sample by Nicholas K. on Scribd

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